The Power of Listening Inwards by Ellinor Otter
Five words that will f**k you up in life are: “What will other people think?”
Have you ever put on a bold outfit, written a vulnerable post ready to press publish on social media or wanted to change direction completely in your career - just to a few moments later think “but what will other people think of this” and then change your mind?
You are not alone. We live in a world where we adjust ourselves a lot to other people's opinions and expectations. We are used to listening to others and seeking approval externally instead of listening inwards and reflecting on what we actually want.
What will my mother-in-law think of my new job? What will my boss think of me wanting a raise? What will my dad think of my new partner? What will my co-workers think of my outfit? What will my followers think of me if I post this? All these voices in our head block us from living our true authentic and honest lives. If we keep listening to other people's opinions of us - we will lose ourselves.
One of my favorite ancient philosophers and writers Lao Tzu once said: “Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner” and he could not be more correct.
Remember to pause in life every now and then and stop to reflect:
What do I do for myself because I want to do it, and what do I do just because it is expected of me?
What do I want in life?
What do I need right now?
What is important to me?
What is my truth?
The only one who has the answers to those questions - are you. No one knows you like you know you. You might think that your family and friends know you best so they should be able to tell you what's best for you, but the truth is - they don't. They don't have your personality, dreams, goals, ambitions, memories, traumas, beliefs, emotional baggage and life experiences. So how could they possibly know what's best for you and what path you should take in life? You are the only one who knows what’s best for you and all the answers to your questions - are already inside you if you just listen.
Before you ask for advice from someone else; Observe if they have the life, relationships & emotional wellness you’d want for yourself. And to quote the American author and activist Glennon Doyle: “Stop asking people for directions to places they’ve never been.”
Let’s say you have a tough dilemma, a huge life changing event, a complicated love situation or a big job offer. What's your go to strategy to find out what to do? In today's society, we are so used to seeking answers outside of ourselves that many of us ask our friends and family to come up with answers and solutions to our problems. And hey, we even tend to ask Google and strangers online when we want answers instead of listening inwards and asking ourselves!
Many of us might say “I have this big decision to make and I don't know what to do!” But the truth is, you do know what to do. You have all the knowledge and wisdom inside you and if you just for one second turn off your head, thoughts, logical thinking and outside noise and instead tune in to yourself, your gut and your heart - you’ll know what to do. Always.
I’m not saying it’s always going to be easy to listen to the whisper of your heart because growth isn't always easy. But I’m saying it is going to be worth it.
Trust yourself and learn how to follow your intuition. This might be difficult if you're not used to listening inwards. But if you practice this, that tiny little whisper from your heart will soon become louder and louder the more you listen until her voice is so loud you can't ignore her. Eventually you’ll have a strong intuition and learn how to use it as a compass in life.
For those reading this I want to encourage you to reflect:
What is important to you? If you try to shut up the voices from others and expectations of society and people around you - what do you want, deep down? Is it really that raise at work or that new job title? Or is it maybe to work less? Travel more? Move to another country? Work with your passion? Spend more time with your family? Or invest time and money in yourself?
If you didn't care what other people thought of you and you weren't afraid - what would you do?
What experiences do you have with listening inwards? Is it something you do everyday? Please share it with me under the hashtag #lyssnanogainåt
If you want to get more inspiration and motivation on how to let your intuition guide you and live an authentic life, let’s connect <3
